Following the prior Pound of Bricks or Feathers post, I had to write about this one.
Just before the 2-week break, which was quite nice, I overheard one of my students asking a question to his friend:
Student 1: "Hey D, what are your eating under there?"
Student 2 replies: "Under where?"
Student 1, laughing: "Oh gross! Your eating your undies?!?!?"
Some things never die, nor should they.
Three of my kids returned from Holiday break with their favorite phrase being:
I start of every morning with a language review, where my students have to correct sentences or answer questions. This week one of the questions was this
Fact or Opinion: Boys look better with short hair than with long hair.
One girl raised her hand and said, "That is definitely an opinion."
Another girl quickly thrust her hand in the air. "But, it's also definitely a fact!", voicing her strong preference.
I had to smile and stated, "Well, it is a definite fact in your opinion."
I had a minor flash back last week. I overheard a fun conversation from my grade school days:
"Hey! What weighs more, a pound of feathers or a pound of bricks?"
And naturally, the response:
"A pound of bricks!"
"Nope! They both weigh a pound! Ha Ha!
It is good to know that some things never die.
I survived the first day of school. It took forever or so it seemed. I only had one "crying" incident.
Most interesting fact I learned about one of my students...One boy won a competitive eat contest this summer. He told me not to ask what happened afterwards.
Some of my summer school kids saw the new Pixar movie and they thought I would like. They recommended I go see the movie "Rat-patooty". I had to laugh.
I had 2 thoughts: 1. Is this is a common mispronunciation for "Ratatouille" and 2. I wonder if Disney gives a rat's *ss. :-)
"It's not about the cheating. It's about the winning!"
--First grade girl, while playing concentration (matching game) after I asked if she was peaking at the cards.
I substituted for a 6th grade class last week and I got my butt kicked. Not physically, but mentally. The class was rambunctious and I couldn't really get them to focus on anything. And to finish the day off, a student told me that he had just "sharted" in his pants.
So, you know the Black Eyed Peas tune, "Let's get it started", right? In my classroom the other day I was trying to get started on a task and said something to the effect of "Hey guys, please have a seat. Let's get it started!"
All of a sudden, one of the quiet, shy kids jumps out of his chair and starts belting out the song complete with his own 2nd grader dance moves.
Let's get it started (ha), let's get it started in here.
Let's get it started (ha), let's get it started in here.
Yeah.
That's what I love about kids. This boy was totally comfortable to "lose control of body and soul" in front of me and his classmates. It was a definite high for me.
My class has been studying dinosaurs and fossils. Earlier this week, we had a wonderful guest speaker who brought in her collection of fossils and petrified objects.
The speaker was telling the class about each of her pieces and where they came from. Then she came to this round and lumpy brown rock and said, "This one is petrified dung." She then paused to see if this got a reaction from my kids. My supervising teacher interjected that "dung is poop". Recognition started to set in, when the guest continued on, "Some people call it sh*t and others call it feces." I just about fell off of my chair with shock and laughter. Luckily, most of the students didn't really pick up on it. However, they spent their free time that day sniffing the petrified poop.
The moral of this story: "Kid say the darnedest things and so can guest speakers!"
Today, I walked into a pole in front of a lot of people. I was walking my students back to class following a school-wide meeting, including parents, and was so intent on listening to a student's story that I didn't see the pole. Totally caught off guard, like getting blind-sided in football. Wham! And several people were looking on. I had to smile and swear internally.
I guess I'm lucky I didn't fall down.
Today's funny story occurred during garden time. Yes, the school I teach at has several garden spots that the kids love to pull weed or play with insects in. While I was pulling up a dandelion, to young girls said, "Mr. B, you need to pull your pants up!" Naturally, I was afraid my crack was hanging out, which I have always been (or tried to be) conscious of. Besides, who knows what a 2nd grader might do. So I did a quick reach around check to make sure. I confirmed no crack was visible, but possibly some waistband was showing. Needless to say, I was a little embarrASSed.
In actuality, my pants are getting big for me. I have lost 8-10 pounds since I have started teaching, which is a good thing.
I was sniffed last week by one of my second graders. Yes, sniffed. A young boy leaned over to me while I was reading a story to a small group and inhaled my shoulder/armpit area. Then he interrupted my reading to announce to the group, "He smells like deodorant!!!" To which the group laughed. I had to smiled and thought to myself, "I can think of worse things to smell like."
